Higher than love higher love

 What is that which kind of suit me which means I kind of maybe that way recover and might connect so that I kind of can maybe by having such forms coming grow into such that some type of “ path” in my experience kind of Grow my being so that I kind of experience it as some type of “ love” that kind of help and suit my self like a new uncorruoted please my shampoo … all kinds of things to have from what I then did grow me that I can maybe one day feel so that’s it’s kind of I arrived to having something to do with “ love “. I must be very smart that I don’t lose . If I invest all are some suckers compared to me I must be highest responsibility and everything do myself these suckers don’t have to anything do … we can only do what we can . If I was “ connected “ associated with somebody tat was actually better somehow also so I then had something in me also to read h out for something new and else I would not repeat for example the same idiots day … if I then rally felt it that something kind of loved myself that suited my that I felt it as that I that accept to myself love also.  So I would arrive to having some love that’s kind of real to most people they it protect as self and powers it’s to them real love not available to others often.  If the experience suit even very well to our selfs it’s called love experience not fascism or forced experience to somebody else gets all live life that they wanna run and things they are for and love . If I was healthy I would have feelings and self saved that way it was my property to I would then have to like love it I am not that way free if ther is not mercy forms of love … my family could abuse me so that I don’t brake or get destroyed so that would be called love . If I had then level and could handle sex and love I would then have higher than love higher love that I would kind of handle love from love and from above love so that it would be real also and ok to much love that I would actually not only me love but somebody else love , so I would learn higher love than my love … but paths to ordinary emotions and my love shared also to anything to anybody else love are not but full of enemies of some love from many reasons like love makes them sad .